No One Can Really Tell The Truth Like John Walsh
VOTE NO ON EACH AND EVERY PROPOSITION! (SEE PREVIOUS BLOG POST AT THIS SITE FOR DETAILS!) THAT MEANS NO FROM # 1 TO # 47!
Don’t pick and choose! The Yes arguments in the voter pamphlet are only designed to confuse you!
AND BE SURE AND VOTE NO ON MEASURE P TO PISS THE POOR POLS OFF!
GOVERNOR: JERRY BROWN
WHY? If he wins, he is going to run for President! Let’s watch Hillary and Jerry tear one another apart next year. Sounds like fun!
LIEUTENANT GOVERNOR: GAVIN NEWSOM!
WHY: This pretty boy is a James Dean lookalike. Let him spend the following 4 years gazing at himself in a mirror until it’s time to run successfully for Governor himself in 2018!
SECRETARY OF STATE: ALEX PADILLA
WHY: It would be politically incorrect to elect all gringos to statewide office.Now wouldn’t it?
CONTROLLER: BETTY YEE
WHY: Ashley Swearengin is a Sarah Palin wolf in sheep’s clothing!
TREASURER: JOHN CHIANG
WHY: He is an incumbent. So we get to save on stationery costs if his chump challenger gets defeated!
ATTORNEY-GENERAL: KAMALA HARRIS
WHY: Because Obama got in trouble for honestly stating publicly how much Kamala’s bi-racial body turned him on! FYI opponent Ronald Gold has a lousy body!
INSURANCE COMMISSIONER: DAVE JONES
WHY: Who cares! You’ll never see this guy or hear his voice for the next four years! Trust me!
SUPERINTENDENT OF PUBLIC INSTRUCTION: TOM TORLAKSON
WHY: He’s been in office for 4 years and the sky hasn’t fallen. His opponent Tuck is a charter school punk who treats Billionaire Bill Gates the same way Monica Lewinsky treated Bill Clinton!
BOARD OF EQUALIZATION
DISTRICT 4: JEROME HORTON
You have to vote for at least one Black guy or else everybody will say you are politically-incorrect!
LA COUNTY BOARD OF SUPERVISORS: SHEILA KUEHL
WHY: She appeared on The Dobie Gillis TV Show in the Sixties when she was a kid! Plus she’s not related by blood to any member of the Kennedy Family alive or dead!
US CONGRESSMAN: TED LIEU
Hopefully, Ted will see fit to convert to Judaism once he’s elected in order to continue the long-running Hebrew streak for this particular LA Westside House seat!
SUPERIOR COURT JUDGE OFFICE 61: JACQUELINE H. LEWIS
WHY: She has a kind face in her official picture.
SUPERIOR COURT JUDGE OFFICE 87: TOM GRIEGO
WHY: Don’t know anything about these judge candidates! However…He gets the endorsement based purely on a hunch: The photo of this kindly middle-aged guy makes me believe he would never sentence me to the gas chamber for a murder that I didn’t commit!
STATE SENATOR DISTRICT 26: SANDRA FLUKE
WHY: She’s an Anti-Iraq War activist who got called a slut by a right-wing radio guy!